This summer I had the opportunity to listen to an amazing guest speaker share some of her experiences living with a child who struggles with mental health.  One story in particular helped me better understand how easily a judgment can be made; often built on a weak foundation of mistaken assumptions.

Here is a brief recap of her powerful story:  For this mother getting her child to school each day was often extremely difficult as a result of her daughter’s ongoing struggles with mental health.  The fact that the child’s father had passed away three weeks prior only confounded the daughter’s emotional wellness.  On one particular evening, like many evenings before, her daughter had great difficulty settling to sleep. The mother spent most of the night comforting her daughter.  When morning came her daughter was too agitated to be school-ready.  Rather than going through the typical morning rituals of fixing hair and dressing, the mother made an alternative choice to spend her morning snuggled up on the couch with her daughter reading a story so that her daughter could be calm and experience as much success at school as possible.  Once at school and walking through the school yard the mother overheard two adults commenting on her unkempt, frazzled, appearance. The adults commented that the mother had clearly been out all night partying and couldn’t even be bothered to get herself presentable to take her child to school.  This faulty assumption left a lasting impression on a mother who had set aside her own needs for those of her daughter.

Making judgments is natural. It is how we determine how to act and how to respond. Often, without realizing it, judgments are instantaneous and based on assumptions.   In this case, seeing someone who looked differently made others feel uncomfortable.    I have challenged myself to think about the assumptions that I make about others.  I want to remember that everyone has a story and to ask myself when I would do the same.  I share this challenge with each of you.